Married Off: Wedding Words From One of the Maids

"I never know when I’ll cry when I’m speaking about people I love in front of large groups, so I figured it’d be safer to write down the words I want to say before they fly away from me in my hour of need...

I’ve known Amanda since kindergarten. We watched each other grow from little girls in frilly dresses with gigantic 90's bows in our hair, to awkward middle schoolers who didn’t know how big the world was yet, to high schoolers who started to understand that life was full of important questions and that we could look for answers together.

We’ve played sports together and traveled to a different country together and sung together and acted in plays together. We’ve talked until we couldn’t keep our eyelids open and cried until they felt swollen shut and laughed until it felt like our skin couldn’t hold the joy inside.

It has been a beautiful 20 years, Amanda Geraldine.

You’ve been the friend who’s a constant. No matter where our feet took us or how many the miles between us, we always picked up where we left off. We’ve always been able to instinctively understand each other’s nooks and crannies, and I’m so grateful God gave me the chance to have a friend like you. Not all people are given that gift.

I plan to still be laughing with you when our hair has turned gray and we have wrinkles carved like canyons through our faces, if God lets us both live to see those years. Ever since the day I first heard the song 'Old Friends' by Simon & Garfunkel, I’ve had a vision of our friendship as we grow old. The picture they present is a simple one, but it fits us. We’ll be the old friends who sit on our park bench like book ends. I think that’s lovely, because it implies an understanding that runs deeper than words.

Thank you for the bright spot you’ve been for me all my life long.

Kevin, I remember when you first became part of Amanda’s life. Before I even met you, I liked you. I had no choice, really. How could I not like a boy who packed a picnic lunch he made himself to eat with Amanda in the park, a boy who watched for unsuspecting old ladies to leave their cars so he could put a bouquet of flowers on their hood, a boy who had the imagination to come up with a date that involved painting on canvases in the bed of his truck? From the moment we met, you have been such a unique person in the best of ways. From a best friend standpoint, you always made me feel so very clearly that you valued my friendship for both Amanda and for yourself. I’ve often found myself caught in wonderment at your thoughtfulness and smiling appreciatively at your sense of humor and your curiosity about the world. You’ve gained my respect in so many ways, and I count you a good friend and one well worth talking to about the most important things in life. You and Amanda couldn’t fit together more perfectly.

I have a lot of memories with Amanda, and I’ve stocked up quite the stash that have Kevin in them now, too.

You know what, though? I think this memory is going to top them all.  

I know a wedding is just one day, but when you know and love Kevin and Amanda as we all do, you know that, really, it isn’t just one day. It’s the culmination of days and it’s the beginning of days. It’s a declaration that there will be so very many days to come, and that Amanda and Kevin want to keep growing and learning and stretching out together in each one of them. It’s about saying to each other, “I’m not done getting to know you.” It’s about God and it’s about beauty and it’s about the love that makes you clench each other’s hands through hard times.

I am so confident that this marriage will last through as many anniversaries as life allows; that you, Kevin, will care deeply for my best friend; and that you, Amanda, will always find joy even during life’s rocky parts.

This is a marriage that is going to grow straight and strong as an oak, and will reach up toward the highest things.

And I bless you in it.

I love you both."